La La La...2002-03-22, 8:18 a.m.I am feeling extremely musical today. I just got off work and I had the stereo going full blast the entire way home, as I sang aloud and played drums on the steering wheel. Then� first thing when I got home I turned the stereo on and did a little strip tease changing out my work clothes. Kinda cute actually. Kinda should be a word but every time I use it my spell checker tries to make it kind of. But kinda sounds much better.Ok back to my story� Last night I bought a new CD. �Brooks & Dunn Steers and Stripes. It has that really good song� �The Long Goodbye� I love that song, real sad though. Ohhhh I love this song� �Keeping the faith� by Billy Joel. Ok I�m getting off track again sorry. The Long Goodbye� if you have not heard it it�s about a man and woman who have been in love for a long time but can't be together without hurting one and other. Sometimes I feel like that with my relationship but I was thinking at work last night and It dawned on me that all the problems between me and Danie right now stem from the fact that I am SO FUCKING GIRL CRAZY! And the only one who can change that� is ME! Too bad I cannot change how I feel, but I can control my actions. I decided the best way to get over my undeniable obsession with the opposite sex is to� make a conscious effort NOT to let an infatuation become physical. I know I should be doing that anyway and I do to an extent but I am going to take it a step further. Some people think me and Danie should take a break. I used to think that would help but when you really think about it, it would become more harmful then helpful. So It needs to be all or nothing� so to speak. I love Danie and I know she Loves me, I know I will never find someone better and I don�t even want to try, so if I cant control my manly urges then I don�t deserve her. A part of me has always known that but I was afraid to admit it to myself. Now I have. I�m a new man� well kinda. There�s that cool word again. But I do need to get to bed. I have to work another graveyard tonight. I hate it but a mans gotta do what a mans gotta do. There another one� gotta. Why the fuck Isn�t gotta a word? The English language is so confusing� Goodnight all. |